Kindness of Strangers

I have on my desk a check. I knew it was worthless when I accepted it. Had I had a moment to contemplate my reaction to the presentation of the check, I would have told the lady to put it back in her purse as I did not want to be paid back. I would have urged her to pay my small act of kindness forward. I never intended to cash the check anyway.


She was stopped on one of the busier ramps in Cincinnati off I-71, less than a mile from our home. Her car sat off to the side, with the hood up. She looked frazzled and a bit bedraggled as she waved me over. I dutifully pulled over, ready to commit an act of kindness. She tells me her story. Her car has died and she has called a tow truck and she needs an additional $28.00 to pay for the tow. So I give her $30.00. She asks me to wait a moment. After briefly entering her car, she emerges and returns to my car, thrusting a check through the window. She tells me she has added $5.00 since I was so nice to her and she wants to pay me back. I thank her and tell her I don't want her check, but she insists. So I drive off.


I must confess that had she not given me a check, I'd have driven home and not thought about it any more. But that act made me suspicious of her. So I turned around after driving a few blocks and drove back past the exit ramp. Her car was still there and she was in her car. So I felt like maybe she was telling me the truth. And maybe she was. But the next day, when I went to the bank, I cashed several checks and asked the teller to check to see if her check was good. "No," I was told, "the account is open, but it has been dormant and empty for so long that the sytems is going to close it after the next statement is run. Apparently, she noted, the account address is not accurate as her statements are being returned.


I refuse to believe she was a bad woman. I envisioned her with young children she needed to feed or clothe. So I actually feel badly that I did not insist that she keep the check. How much sleep did she lose, thinking I might report her to the police for giving me a check she knew was not good. I wish so badly that I could have saved her that worry. Then, my kindness might have felt good and whole.


I'm intrigued by the Starbucks "pay it forward" phenomenon. Apparently, every so often, someone in line pays for the coffee of the person behind them. That act then gets passed backward for long periods of time. Who starts these things...and who ends them?


One of John Maxwell's main principles is that giving to others makes you a better person. It's not magic. It's simple. Such activity makes you feel better about yourself. When you feel better about yourself, you treat others better and they treat you better. And the cycle continues. My theory on doing good and its' influence on the world is best illustrated by the rings created by dropping something into water. The ring of waves spreads quickly from the center. Depending on the size of the object, the waves are bigger or smaller and last longer or fade more quickly. But the illustration is lacking. Sometimes, a person who is touched by the wave of kindness is moved to toss a larger gift into the pool of good deeds. And this sets off a larger wave. So I envision, instead, a sort of Rube Goldberg device that is triggered by a wave of kindness and which somehow triggers new waves which repeat the process endlessly. Positive Waves are a perpetual motion machine.


When have you experienced the kindness of a stranger or shown kindness that may have made a difference in someone's life? Have you heard any stories of small acts of kindness that pay large dividends? Does an unexpected smile make a difference in your day? Can you make a difference in someone's day?

Report back next week. Take the challenge. Do something kind for someone and see if it triggers a smile, a sense of good will, a new good deed. It may take longer to see the results. But I believe, regardless of whether you see the results, that goodness breeds goodness. A smile breeds more smiles. Send out a ring of good will this weekend.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rube_Goldberg